naie: what do you want iqa. i don't have mood to listen to anything..
iqa: naie, don't be like this. you should be strong. you know you love him so much, don't you?
naie: i cry and i can't stand this because i love him so much. so, you don't have to think twice about why i cry so hard.
iqa: i know you love him so much, so that's why you have to be tough. you are one hell of a tough cookie naie. you should know what he wishes the most now. i believe he loves you so much too and that it must be that he wants you to study hard for your future and for now, your exams. i'm sure he doesn't want you to be this sad and down.
naie: but tell me iqa, how should i be strong in this situation, knowing that i am losing him and we didn't succeed in working out our relationship? i hate this so much, call me baby, i can't live without him, what more to strive for my exams? i did try to focus, but he's a big part of me. i need to gather all parts to be alive like he always made me but without him, it's just incomplete and how can that make me okay?
iqa: i know how you feel naie...
naie: no, you don't. u will never know how it feels.
iqa: i'm sorry that i can't make you feel better. i guess he's the only one who can make you okay.. i'm just too sad seeing you cry and long for him like this but you can't say anything nor reach him and cry to him..please be tough naie, that's all i can say. by the way, he did ask you to study hard for your future yesterday right? and i thought you said okay..why are you still crying now dear?
naie: what should i answer him iqa? should i say no and burden him even more? or should i say no and i don't want him to let me go? i don't even know what he feels towards me anymore, i don't think taking care of me is making him happy, what more, to love me? deep down inside, i really wish that he still loves me, but i can't read mind nor heart, how can i force him to? you know what iqa, i really want to be some kind of inspiration or pembakar semangat to him, to excel in his studies and all, not just a gf, but more than that. but what am i to him, i am just a burden iqa. i don't want to be that. am i that bad iqa? is it true that i am not good at all? what more to become an inspiration to him? i really wish that in his heart, even just for a while, during the times that we were together, even just once, that i had become an inspiration to him.. that's all. and i think that, can inspire and help me to survive.
iqa: you are making me cry even harder lah naie, can you stop crying please. hingus pun dah leleh leleh tu..
naie: why bother talking to me then?
iqa: because i am your twin right? i won't ever leave you naie. so, if you cry, i'll cry too. if you are happy, i'll be laughing along with you sampai pecah perut. if you don't eat, i'll share with you the hunger, and if you can't sleep at night, i'll be reminiscing everything with you. i love you naie, and i believe, deep down inside him, he loves you too, more than you can ever imagine.
naie: iqa, nanti kite nak pergi jalan jalan. nak pergi bangi, kajang, klang, genting, alamanda, escalator midvalley, klcc, sunway, timesquare, low yatt, kl sentral, kuala kangsar, germany semua. awak temankan kite ok.
iqa: kita dua je?
naie: ha ah, kita dua je.
iqa: okay naie. now can you please study for tomorrow's paper dear?
naie: i don't think i can, but i'll try. sikit sikit je boleh.
iqa: better sikit sikit dari tak boleh langsung. do your best okay naie. ingat, i am always here for you.
naie: sakit kepala lah awak..picitkan please..
iqa: okay, asalkan awak boleh study afterwards okay.
naie: zzzZZZZZ
No comments:
Post a Comment